Saturday, July 28, 2012

Desperate for help said... I have and special needs child and he is becoming terribly hateful. I do not know what he needs and he has a deep rooted hatred. I do not know what to do for him. Should I take him out of his special needs school and transistion him to public school. I just want what is best for him, and nothing seems be working. Can you help. Angela 32 - Columbus OH.

So when I stop and really think about your son, it is not that he angry but he has a lot of pent up frustration.  I think his mind constantly going, but his lack of verbal and written abilities makes it hard for him to get his thoughts out.  And for whatever reason, if he had activities that worked his mind to release some of the buildup, it would be like sending you child outside to run to burn up energy, except his mind need to burn up energy.  I think that even though he, or I think he enjoys watching certain shows on TV, that does not expel his mental energy, it just occupies it.  That ball of energy is still in his mind festering.. And I know that reading, which he probably cannot do to work his imagination, but I feel like there is one specific optical illusion that when he looks at it, it will work his imagination, and actually create a calming affect on him.  I will give you that optical illusion, and I feel like if you possibly put it on the ceiling about his bed, he will sit their and look at it and it will calm him.  In regards to school, I almost think it might be a good change for him to try to go to public school, because where he is at he is not really exposed to typical children to know how they act.  And..Also in a public school he will get exposed to typical children, will have role models on behavior, and then still be able to obtain therapy, but he can be more focused on, rather than just being a number in his current school.  I feel like in his current situation, maybe part of his frustration, and I "visualizing a hamster in cage, and the cage has a handle, and they are living this hamster in a cage, but caring by the handle from place to place"  I feel like he feels like that hamster he is being suffocated or trapped from one location to the next.  He never gets out of that situation and feels confined.  Possibly a public school, would help him feel not so trapped.  I just a picture of him standing on the sidewalk, and he is scanning left and right, and he has this exhilarated feeling of like freedom.  And then he just picks somewhere to run.  I feel like that is why he runs off.  Then I just heard "Run Forrest, Run" in my mind.  Like this kid is craving some freedom.  I think he loves being outside...I can see him running around a field, um and he is holding a ball, he is not kicking it or throwing it, but in his mind he is playing a game.  I do not know if you can take him to a place like that which is safe, but if you can, give him a ball and let him think they are playing a game, I think he would love that freedom....I kinda think he fascinated with stuff in the sky, airplanes...I actually see him looking up at toy airplane in the sky, it is outside not inside.  And my mind is flashing to that place by Alum Creek in Lewis Center Ohio where they fly remote controlled airplanes.  I think he would love it... I don't know if she ever incorporates him into your cooking or preparing food, but I see him smashing or mixing food in a bowl, and he is loving it.  It is stimulating some type of sensory thing with him.  I feel likes things that he can touch and experience, rather than have someone constantly telling him what to do, he feels like he cannot get enough sensory experiences.  And I also feel like um, it is kinda, once he experiences it, for most people it forms like a memory in your mind, but in his case as soon as he is done with it, he loses that memory.  I am getting that movie 30 first dates with Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore, so that is what causes a lot of his repetition is because he is trying to regain that memory and experience it again.  I just got an image of him liking your living room floor, and I felt like because most people might have an assumption of what that experience would be like, but he does not, and does not have boundaries, he is just wanting to experience all of life.  It is more of a curiosity thing, he is not trying to upset you.  I just got a weird feeling like something is wrong with my grandma.  One of the points I am trying to make is that I feel like a lot of things are done to pacify him, rather than just fulfilling his need.  Other visions:  I see him in a lap swimming pool with lines in the bottom, he is swimming and he is happy.  I see him on a playground in this specific playground has a metal chain link fence around the perimeter and he cannot get out, and he is on the swings trying to go as high as he can, and he is happy.  Another image I am getting is, possibly Alum Creek, but it has sand,  he is jamming his feet in the sand and he is loving the texture on his feet.  I am seeing and enormousness park, tons of green space, there is wooden split rail fence around the part, the part is huge, and you guys are making a game of how many dandelions you can pick, and it the time of year when the dandelions have the white ball on the top, because he is seeing the white things float off and he is loving that too.  In that exact same park, I am going back to image of airplane in sky, he is running around with his arms outstretched like and airplane, running as free as can be and he is happy.  I think there might be a tree there he can climb because I see him sitting in a tree and he is happy.  As I side note, I see a sibling involved in all these activities and it is beneficial for her as well.  I think she needs this too.  I see him watching young boys a little older than him on Rollerblade playing hockey and he thinks that is really cool, and he mesmerized by that and thinks the roller blade thing is really cool.  I also see a tree with a big thick brown climbing rope, it was tied at the top and it had 3 knots at the bottom probably about 1 foot apart, and I see him hauling balls and running with everything he had and grab it and swing and he loved it.  He did it over and over to the point where I felt that you could sit back and let him do it, like it would be a break for you.  I see this in your back yard, it is very distinctive, I see him doing this many times over and over again.
Here is a much better version my husband made in paint.  
Print this out and put on his ceiling, I feel if you put it where he can reach it he will take it down.

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